It is not often that I write about proper nouns 'cause my conscience prevents me from writing about personal loss or bereavement. Also, I am an overly romantic believer of the fact that if you come from a difficult place and that is all you have to write about then you should stop writing. Further, I could acknowledge a million reasons why I am not the right man to write about "Acharya Shri Nirmal Chandra", The Gandhian reformer. There are people more qualified and dignified than me who can do that.
However, the person I could write about was my Baba and how he completely changed my concept about God, unknowingly.
My Grandfather died on the 15th of May 2013 at around 2 p.m. while holding my hand. I saw the most moral man of my life struggle to breathe in his last hours & yet I couldn't accumulate pity over his penance. Instead, I was angry (furious to an extent) I wanted to order him to stand up at once. Standing there, wailing at the painful sight of a man I loved, wrap into his end I wished to complain to whoever I could and that was when a realization struck me.
That was when I wanted to believe that there exists a higher authority, A supreme being who could cure him irrespective of what his blood sugar indicated or whatever rubbish came out of the ultrasonography. I demanded the existence of A GOD.
Coming Back to my Grandfather. He was a man close to some of the mightiest leaders of India. Right From Dr Rajendra Prasad to Vinoba Bhave and a little brother to Jayprakash Narayan. Yet If there is one word in the English Dictionary That best describes Him it is "HUMBLE".Or at least that was how I knew him to be. He was My first teacher, the best too. He taught me everything right from calculating to drawing to writing. He used to teach me several mantras & I am ashamed that I have forgotten most of those. And I am sorry that I am unable to write much about him. It is only this little Homage That I am capable of. He was a man I knew in my family who had achieved supreme greatness socially and psychologically. Death came to him as a friend and he greeted it with incredible calmness.
I have heard of the philosophy of the 3 deaths. It says that every being on this planet dies thrice. The first death is when that man takes his last breath. The second is when he turns to dust and the third & the most painful is when his name is taken for the last time on earth. I am incredibly sure that that third death of my grandfather is still centuries away.
In my first post on this blog, I pondered quite superficially over death. Now I know it as an important part of a great life. The most beautiful part of a great man's life is that it ends. My Grandfather was an artist in every true sense of the word and his death was his greatest masterpiece.
A proud Grandson of a Worthy Grandfather
However, the person I could write about was my Baba and how he completely changed my concept about God, unknowingly.
Now when I recall that helplessness of mine I gather that just as my denial or refusal of the existence of a superior being will owe me nothing. Even so, my denial of an unalterable law or a lawgiver(I assume both to be the same)will never liberate me from its operation. And as the "first proper noun I ever wrote about" M.K. Gandhi said, "Humble And Mute acceptance of a divine authority makes life's journey easier".It is his definition of God that rendered my Baba's intellect the most.
"In the midst of death life persists, In the midst of untruth truth persists, In the midst of darkness light persists. Hence I gather that God is Light, Truth, Life. He is Love. He is the supreme Good.
I have heard of the philosophy of the 3 deaths. It says that every being on this planet dies thrice. The first death is when that man takes his last breath. The second is when he turns to dust and the third & the most painful is when his name is taken for the last time on earth. I am incredibly sure that that third death of my grandfather is still centuries away.
In my first post on this blog, I pondered quite superficially over death. Now I know it as an important part of a great life. The most beautiful part of a great man's life is that it ends. My Grandfather was an artist in every true sense of the word and his death was his greatest masterpiece.
A proud Grandson of a Worthy Grandfather
